He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
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