Me too!
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
