I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
