I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
