he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
