Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
