Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I touched a dick in church today
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Come on in and take your pants off
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