I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
how does that bad decision feel?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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