Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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