David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
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