Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
They should really pass out barf bags in church
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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