I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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