you win again, gameday.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize