Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
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