When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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