one two three fourrrrnication!
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
