Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
They have beer where we have blood.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
