we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
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im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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