apparently the secret to your success is patron
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
