wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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