so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
