chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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