I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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