I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize