I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
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I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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