"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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