She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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