they said they heard you say put it in my butt
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
