Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
