Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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