The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
