I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize