Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
soo... how was my night?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize