i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
