google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
