he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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