i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
