please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize