I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
