Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
