so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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