There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
