She is in my trunk
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
