My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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