it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
