her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize