I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
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