I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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