Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Two words: nipple clamps
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