sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize