The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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