If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize